Teacher Humor from Songs 4 Teachers...
The lighter side of Education. It's what gets us through the day!
26 songs and 12 poems to
promote Character Education in your classroom...
Celebrate Me! E-Book
Perfect for All About Me or
I Am Special classroom themes
Kindergarten to 3rd Grade
Actual School Absence
These are excuse notes from parents (including original spelling) collected by schools from all over the country.
1. My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him. 2. Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot. 3. Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33. 4. Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating. 5. Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip. 6. John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face. 7. Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part. 8. Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins. 9. Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side. 10. Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels. 11. Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak. 12. Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust. 13. Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault. 14. I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don't know what size she wear. 15. Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday. 16. Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral. 17. My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines. 18. Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well. 19. Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps. 20. Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover. 21. Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor. 22. Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.
I Don't Want To Go To
Early one morning, a mother went in to wake up her son. "Wake up, son. It's time to go to school!" "But why, Mom? I don't want to go." "Give me two reasons why you don't want to go." "Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me also!" "Oh, that's no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready." "Give me two reasons why I should go to school." "Well, for one, you're 52 years old. And for another, you're the PRINCIPAL!"
Good Clean School Jokes
An exasperated mother, whose son was always
getting into mischief, finally asked him:
Five minutes later:..
"I'm thirsty. Can you bring me a drink of water?"
"No. You had your chance. Lights out."
Five minutes later...
"Da-aaaad...I'm THIRRRR-STY. Can I have a drink of water??"
"I told you NO! If you ask again, I'll have to spank you!!"
Five minutes later...
"When you come in to spank me, can you bring me a drink of water?"
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